


On a Prayer

by flannelcastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drabble Collection, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-05
Updated: 2013-04-06
Packaged: 2017-12-07 12:39:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flannelcastiel/pseuds/flannelcastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On-going drabbles from various points of view. The episode which they are meant to accompany will be specified. Most of these are just writing exercises.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. PRAYER  [PRAIR]

Humiliated, foolish—it utterly panged at Dean’s stolid wall of pride to weave his fingers and quietly pray to the angel whom he thought would always listen.

It was enough that Castiel tore his walls to fucking shreads, through miles of purgatory pain and suffering, after months of coming to terms with the worst, and finally laying eyes on the son of a bitch breathing before him. It was enough to see the terror of his memories reflected back in the eyes of an immortal, near-indestructible being. But words would never suffice for the joy that spread through the threads and fibers of his being when they were there—together. They fought, they lived, and they would never die, if not together.

So why would the angel not come, when a rare prayer escaped his lips? Why could he not drop down from his perch and quell his fears, like he had done so many nights in purgatory?

_I always come when you call._

If that were the truth, Dean would walk the Earth sinless; though Castiel did always come when he was in absolute need.

Each second brought him closer to the realization that every moment was filled with need.

So why did Castiel not answer his prayer?


	2. you are not my family, dean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based off Castiel's line, "you are not my family, Dean" in Goodbye Stranger
> 
> Dean is actually much more; even so, those were Naomi's words, not his.

Her words were always incessant, always painful and always digging into the tender flesh of his mind. Castiel knew that he should not feel such pain, for he only sat in a normal chair before Naomi’s desk, a desk which was the only object separating the angel who rebelled and the angel who sought to reform him.

He would tell her time and time again, there was no reformation when it came to Dean or Sam or any of the other seemingly unimportant humans he had met. Even befriending that damned vampire from Purgatory was favorable compared to leading the eternal existence he once had—without a thought of his own or a purpose except to serve a higher power that had abandoned him.

Naomi knew all the right words to say. When Castiel would resist her attempts to purge his mind of its individuality, he would say, “they are my family. I am theirs. I must—”

“You must do nothing, but serve heaven, Castiel,” Naomi would snap, both calm and enraged in this singularly frightening breath. “Remember Castiel? Your true family? The thousands of brothers and sisters you slaughtered in the name of those  _humans?_ ”

The reminder would shake Castiel and would become more tame.

“I regret the death,” Castiel would murmur above the whimpers, above the cries as she invaded his mind further. “But I do not regret it all. It was God’s will, to serve the humans—”

“God is gone, and in his absence we must serve the will of heaven Castiel. You are a failure. You are a disgrace. How could those humans ever forgive you after all the travesties you caused to befall upon humanity?”

Castiel would not neglect the knowledge that Dean had vocally forgiven him, prayed for his presence. Dean had forgiven him. Naomi was wrong.

But she would break him. Over and over.

She would dissect his every fear and throw it against him.

And he would never remember that pain, when he would return to Sam and Dean.

But he always remembered her words:  _“They are not your family.”_


End file.
